33 minute rant

Okay hello ;) I got scolded yesterday 1/7/11 for returning home at 1045 just because the train was slow and then followed by arsehole bus who didn't come and took a long time. So I've got a 10pm curfew. But I swear I've been home later than that before and that's because it was after youth mass and we went for supper and all. And this time round I was mugging with my church friends and literally doing homework and like getting help from each other. Like I mean ya la, my fault for so late but then I was studying and who knows studying with cc3 friends could be really effective I can literally do all my amath question. So my mummy told me about security reasons on why I've to be home early and not so late and I get what she means but this means that no more BBQs or fun after youth mass / cip. Like uh, cip at morning star or like supper after youth mass or like bbq which is like urghhhhh. :( gosh hope that mum and dad can make an exception on these ocassions. But I swear I'll be back by 10 when I go study with my cc3 friends.
Oh and another thing. My mum is like uh trying to get me help my bro find cip. Guess what? I have my own slp project to do and I've to call organisations one by one and now my brother dont have to do that. Reason being: I've to help him. Which is like uh.. When you getting independent? :|
And and i dont wanna cut my hair. I really don't want. Like I'll miss tying braids or playing with my hair which is so annoying. Then if i cut, my hair will freeze too. Urghhh then I'll most probably have a problem with braiding and all and touching my hair and play when im bored.
Ok so yeah. Week one just passed. I feel so dead like I wanna sleep like now but I decided to type this all put in my phone before I can sleep because like jon who can't sleep because he was thinking about stuff. And well as for me im scared for term 3. I'm like the only idiot who is rushing her notes and doing all she can which includes night study sessions with my cc3 friends and asking questions here and there. Soon I'll just forgo recess and lunch to study. OMG. So stress la. Amath and emath ca3 adds up to like 7 topics and im a weakling at math and physics. Wait. Im not a nerd ok. I just dont wanna disappoint my parents with that fat and disgusting f9 in my disgusting ppr.. And besides like what ms Yee said 'sec three is a foundation year'. I dont wanna be screwed. Everything seems hard and scary. Lessons seem so dry. And some zombie drinking 500ml of water every lesson and go the toilet between every lesson break and get scolded.
Its not my fault for sleeping late either. Rushing notes, mind screwing homework and anxiety within me..cca, school, family, friends. Soon in 6 weeks, it will be CA3 and in 12-13 weeks it will be eoys. Then my birthday will be forgotten, and I'll mug on my birthday and even forget its my day. Bet eoys will be damn bloody gross like sec two worse than that I guess. I know im thinking far come to think of it, time passes really fast. And I think im neglecting god again. Only my cc3 friends remind me of god. In school no one gives a shit. And I feel peaceful whenever im with them maybe because gods presence? I feel so peaceful when i study with them. Not saying school is like jdjsnsjslso but i dont feel the stress and less tense. Ok wtv I've to sleep past my bed time alr. Gotta do homework till late at night and once again get nagged.
And yes why am I typing this. Its 2nd July 12.33am.
This post starts at 12am and its a 33mi n rant..
Now, I think I can sleep properly with lesser anxiety within me. God, help me. :(